Yesterday I wrote about the Principles to Live By as thy apply to adults. Today's blog will have the same general focus, however I'll talk about the role they play in a child's life.
Some years ago, as the result of my work with children, it came to me that if a child is going to thrive, to live fully, to be able to develop his/her gifts, there are certain needs and preferences the child needs in order to do that.
Following is what I’ve come to understand ....
1. Each child has a need to be listened to and honestly heard.
2. Each child needs to have reasonable expectations for his/her behavior and when old enough, to be part of creating the rules and regulations they are asked to live by.
3. Each child needs space and time to think their own thoughts.
4. Each child needs down time…time to be without having to follow another’s constant requests.
5. Each child needs to feel valued, respected, honored and loved.
6. Each child deserves to live in a state of “contented awareness” and not “anxious awareness”.
7. Each child needs to have nutritious foods provided at regular intervals.
8. Each child needs to feel safe.
9. Each child needs to have a predicable schedule.
10. Each child deserves to live in a clean and organized home.
11. Each child deserves to live in a harmonious and peaceful environment.
I believe most of these points are easy to understand. Number six, however, the one that reads “Each child deserves to live in a state of “contented awareness” and not “anxious awareness”, may not be clear. As a result this is where I will place the emphasis in the rest of today's blog.
Some years ago when I had remembrances from when I was in utero and of my early life as an infant, I realized that I lived in an unsettled environment and that I had learned to live in a state of “anxious awareness” from these early experiences.
After some research on the subject, I learned that when in utero, or as an infant or as a young child, if you are insecure in your environment, you often live in a state where you are always on “alert”; your are always making sure there is no danger around.
As you mature, this can become a way of life. Looking back on the years when I was in school I believe I carried this “state of being on alert” into my school life. And although I love learning and am very creative, I sense there were some “gaps” of learning in my education.
From these experiences as well as being a parent of three children,
I feel very strongly that as a society we must take PARENTING much more seriously than we currently do!
As a society we must find ways to help people realize the responsible they are taking on when they begin the journey into parenthood. To help them understand that when you become a parent YOU then become responsible for the well-being of another human being.
In addition, I'd love to see numerous additional resources for parents to support them on their parenting journey and in their role as "mom and dad"! And as one takes on the task of parenthood in a responsible way, and is fully present for all that goes on, one can then find the many and true joys of being a parent.
I’d particularly love to hear your response to this and yesterday's blog. What do you feel is important, both for the adult and the child? Are you thriving? Are your children thriving? What is your next step in development to bring any more PEACE into your life?